In Lights

sexta-feira, junho 29, 2018




we don’t have to wait all night
to know if this really love.
we don’t have to wait all night
caus
e I can feel you in my blood
(The Veronicas)

Feeling.

Don’t know exactly what. Can’t understand what it is, still I’m feeling. There’s fire in my blood; there’s light in my eyes. On and off. Maybe cause I’m blinking.

But that’s not everything. There’s something else.

Pulse rushing. Head reeling. I’m boiling. Fervid as flame. Is that all? No… I get the signs of my body, but I don’t know what they mean.

But I’m feeling.

What do I know?

I know three things only.

One: there’s music.

It’s not that obvious as it sounds. Music’s all I hear now and that’s easy to understand why. But if I were to close my ears, if I were to prevent myself from the sound around, I’d still hear music inside of me. There’s no emptiness. Everything’s full.

I can feel it in my bones – the beat is shaking me from the inside. From head to toe, all my skin, all my muscles are music. I’m the bass; if there was a guitar, I’d be that too. I’m the groove and the silence. I’m the calm and the explosion.

I’m the whole song.

That’s why I know there’s music.

I know three things only.

Two: he’s here.

There may be other people - I kinda remember other people - but he’s the only one I feel around. He’s the only one I want around.

Not around… closer.

I don’t need my eyes opened. I can feel him. I recognize his hands on my hips, on my shoulders, all around me. I know his body heat and rhythm. I just know his moves, even when he isn’t moving towards me.

He’s everything I want. He may never be my only one, but he’ll always be my favorite. He and his sunny smile, which I can’t see through neon lights, but I know is there. A smile in purple lips. Purple like mine. A piece of art that only a lipstick kiss can provide – a kiss he wants to give me, a kiss I wanna have right now.

His purple lips are on mine. No real kiss; thou his lips are sweet, my mouth gets bitter. Too bitter, but still delicious.

It’s him. I can’t feel bad if he’s so close to me. It feels like heaven. I feel like floating. Maybe I actually am. Don’t know exactly where I am, but that doesn’t really matter… I like what I’m feeling.

And I know he’s here.

I know three things only.

Three: I love…

Feeling…

Do I love him?

I know three things only: I know there’s music. I know him. What’s the third thing again?

I can’t concentrate. I can barely breathe. I wanna breathe him in – he’s my drug. He’s my high. He’s the fire that lights me up.

I wanna be his air. Wanna be all his secrets.

Wanna touch him. Wanna dance with his hands. I want his hair between my fingers. I don’t have to see. Don’t wanna see. Just wanna feel him closer – like I feel the music: inside me and all around me. Calmness and explosion. Up and down. Noise and silence.

My head spinning. Can’t see clear no more. Can’t think straight. We’re into echos. We’re into chaos. We’re fireworks. We’re falling stars. Can’t wait no more. I’m on the edge of no control. Feels like I’m running out of time. Don’t wanna wait ‘til the end of the night. Don’t need to.

This feeling…

I know one thing only: can feel it in my blood and brain. He knows that too – can hear in his voice and dance. Can see in his eyes and smile.

Our love is in lights.

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